Tension, anxiety, fears and pressure-
all invisible falsehoods, falsely claiming to represent something real but today-
today when I heard the news that he, a little boy, Yisroel Levi Yitzhak had fallen and passed away, it was all ripped apart
it was as if Hashem had uncovered the sheet that covered from my eyes and tensed my muscles, that informed me that there were Things to Worry About, such as Not Getting Enough Done or Inconveniences to be Frustrated About and Little Hurts and Personal Pet Peeves and all of that muck
Hashem drew that curtain back, far from reality, when I gasped at the news, that the boy was not breathing any longer.
For time then stopped, and my body slouched forward and Everything, Everything that had been pressing down on me suddenly lifted, and all I saw was what was Real- the things that I truly cared about, that were what was worth Focusing on- family, friends, truth, life
Everything peeled away and I was angry- angry that it takes something like this to remember that all of those things we call Worries and Anxiety and Fears have another name- Falsehoods, Sheker, Distractions. Distractrions from Reality. From Truth.
I pray tonight that that little neshama's passing had an effect on me that will last past these few precious minutes in which I realize that so little is actually pressing on my shoulders, that so little needs to be rushed after and grabbed and seized and worried about. Things just need to be cherished and loved and held.
Beyond this level of Time that seems to be endlessly ticking and squelching our experiences, is something much deeper- the Beyond, the Truth, the What Really Matters.
May we touch that, that Mattering, and tell all anxieties and fears that we see through them, tonight and all nights.
May the neshama of Yisroel Levi Yitzhak ben Sara Rivka be elevated and all family comforted among the mourners of Zion.